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This ain’t no ranch hunting, Dick Cheney! DinoHunters pursue prehistoric beasts millions of years back in time. Join us every Tuesday night at 9:00 on the Total Hunting Channel for the biggest game hunting known to man!
Featured Mission
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DinoHunters Episode Four - "Monster Island"
Welcome to Episode 4 of DinoHunters-one Mother of a Multiplayer game! Today, we invite you to head up the hunt across land, sea and air to take down some of the nastiest beasts in history -- your friends! (And some walnut-brained, dung-flinging dinosaurs, too.)
There's been a big ol' overhaul on the pteranodon's appetite-now it's even hungrier for humans! And at the request of a few people who were offended at the XXL hands you have in episode 1, we made 'em, uh.daintier. There are a couple new beasties walking the earth, but don't let the new targets distract you from the bigger enemy: the greenhouse gassing, resource-sapping, loathsome litterbug: Man.
Other serious improvements include the look and feel of your weapons: the pistol, shotgun, quad, and magnesium flares, all of which got an ass kickin' makeover.
This map also features our new MP scoring modes.
Standard - standard deathmatch scoring mode
LifeTime Score - you lose all you points upon death. The final scores are ranked by the highest score achieved during a single life.
0 Point Death - you lose all your points upon death. The final scores are ranked by highest score at end of match.
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The Wooly Mammoth: The Biggest Prehistoric Hunt of Them All!
Jump in the time-traveling RV—today, we’re in hot primordial pursuit of the mean and fugly Wooly Mammoth! You’ve got a team of highly skilled DinoHunters to help pepper the sky with firepower, but ultimately it’s up to you to conquer the terrifying Pteranodons, massive Mammoths, and, mmmm…giant beavers that rule the earth.
Providing something like giant, razor-toothed fish don’t mince your meat first, you’ll use a variety of not-so-primitive weaponry to seek and destroy your way across the land. You can grab a spear or use your quad shotgun for those close encounters, but you may find the rocket launchers, magnesium flares, and flammable liquid make for a delightful dino-meat tenderizer!
But beware: these beasts are not only immense in size, but show surprising ingenuity. They won’t hesitate to ambush you from behind, and the flying dinosaurs drop explosive turds that’ll melt you like a witch in water. Take aim from a safe distance, and conserve your ammo for the really nasty surprises to come. |
UPCOMING EPISODES
Here are upcoming adventures you don’t want to miss:
April
18: It’s a wet and wild ride when the crew ladles up a surprise from the fishing hole: Serpents!
25: The DinoHunters seek out the horniest dinosaur in history: the Triceratops.
May
2: Break out the orange glaze: The crew faces off against the funky-looking (but delicious!) duck-billed dinosaur.
9: DinoHunters travel back 150 million years to take on the fearsome 5-inch parrot dinosaur. Polly wanna flame thrower?
16: When Harlan sucks down an aquatic centipede from the bottom of the tequila bottle, the crew learns modern-day alcohol does not kill 400 million-year-old venomous fangs. [Viewer discretion is advised]
23: The crew is knocked unconscious for days, but is taught a valuable lesson: Burning fossilized dung is like smoking a tractor tire!
30: Ole! Roger challenges a massive Torosaurus dinosaur, but when his red cape and spear prove ineffective against eight raging tons of muscle, Candy calls in the clowns.
June
6: Psychedelisaurus! Shaw takes us on an unforgettable trip to explore the effects of primordial fungi.
13: Herbivore galore! The gang goes into the late Triassic period to create a one-ton salad bar by filleting a Placerias.
20: Harlan’s time-consuming task of fashioning steak knives from the serrated teeth of the Tyrannosaurus leaves Candy asking, “Where’s the [censored] beef?”
27: Shaw’s in for one shell of a ride on the back of an enormous, carnivorous sea turtle. Unlike fairy-tale turtles, Archelon is not slow and steady, but it may just be hungry enough to win the race!
July
4: Independence Day, The crew takes a holiday in the year 2776. Finally, we're out of Iraq!
11: DinoHunters discover, when wrapped around their necks, Dinilysia coils are significantly stronger than suggested in modern literature.
18: Roger is trapped in the nest of a soon-to-be-returning great flying reptile. But with the crew’s laundry piling up, a delay in repairing the crane is unavoidable.
25: Harlan graphically demonstrates how the Belemnite’s soft and squishy, squid-like body is delicately balanced by the multiple, razor-sharp hooks embedded in its cute little tentacles.
August
1: The crew learns Whip Scorpion is a name, not a game...and this nasty little predator sprays acid on everything it’s thrown at.
8: The gang “baits” Roger into the carnivorous fish pool. [Viewer discretion is advised]
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